Broken English

At the beginning of our teaching jobs, we found that a regular sentence spoken to a class full of Korean kids just wasn't getting the point across. So we had to adjust our speaking style. And we found ourselves using fewer and fewer words in our sentences. It's not the best way to teach English, but sometimes you have to make changes to get your point across. It's getting better now and we can have some semblance of conversation with some of the students, but we still have our old standby phrases and words that have stuck as the basic set of instructions. If we were to have conversations like this with English speakers it would be considered juvenile at best and inexplicable at worst, but a class of Koreans would acknowledge us without question. This is what you may hear if you were to walk in our classrooms.

1. Hello.
2. Main books.
3. Time.
4. Chair. (Probably the word used most in any given class.)
5. Page 14 Three Stickers.
6. Bye bye time.

Translations provided below for those not used to these types of abbreviated sentences.

1. Hello.
2. Please take out your main textbooks so we can begin our lesson for today.
3. I have to leave the classroom right now, so please wait patiently and quietly and I will be back shortly.
4. Get your ass back in that chair!! I've said it five times already and God knows I'll be saying it ten more times to you before class is over, but please listen to me this one time and, for the love of God, sit down!!
5. I can see that you aren't getting any of your written assignments done, so now I will bribe you with 3 Wonderland stickers if you finish the work on page 14.
6. Pack up your bags as frantically as possible because the bell will be ringing in 30 seconds, at which time all ten of you can stampede toward the door and try to push your way out through the opening as ten more students try to push their way in . Good luck with that, and bye bye for now.